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About Us

Introducing TechGuru Unlimited, the world's most innovative company that you've never heard of. We specialize in combining the most buzzworthy tech concepts to create products that no one asked for. Our team of highly skilled individuals spends countless hours deciphering trendy jargon, ensuring we deliver the cutting-edge solutions that nobody understands.

Our Mission

Our mission is to revolutionize the way people perceive technology by pushing the boundaries of incomprehensibility. With an unwavering commitment to perplexity and confusion, we strive to develop products that not only sound futuristic but also leave our users questioning their very existence. Together, we'll pave the way to a future where buzzwords reign supreme and actual functionality is secondary.

Groundbreaking 12G Scooter

Redefining Personal Mobility! Our cutting-edge scooter features unmatched nanotechnology and AI-powered performance, all wrapped up in a hand-drawn design that defies expectations.

Experience seamless 12G (whatever that means) connectivity as you glide through smart cities, powered by our eco-friendly Flux Capacitor Energy System™.

And, for the first time in human history, you'll be able to unlock the full potential of the scooter's quantum entanglement technology. Yes, that's right - teleportation* is finally a reality!

*Teleportation is not guaranteed and may or may not result in scooter and rider being lost in space-time. Use Quantum Warp Drive™ at your own risk.

AI Powered Toothbrush

Our unparalleled smart toothbrush is equipped with state-of-the-art AI technology (If statements) that not only redefines oral hygiene but has the added joy of a mandatory subscription!

Our groundbreaking Deep Learning Bristle Matrix™ adapts to your brushing style. Requiring a mere ten minutes connecting your toothbrush to our smartphone app

Unlock the full potential of the AI-Powered Toothbrush by subscribing to our exclusive Toothbrush Premium™ plan, giving you access to advanced features and ensuring that your toothbrush is in sync with your ambitions.

Embrace the future of dental care with the AI-Powered Toothbrush, one app-connected, subscription-based brush at a time.

Psst, want a sneak peek at some of our other totally existent products, but for which I was to lazy to make a webpage? Click the button down below and prepare to be mildly amused!